1
00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:06,923
Hey, Mom. You got a minute?
2
00:00:06,923 --> 00:00:09,759
Honey, not this mornin'.
I am runnin' so late for work.
3
00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:12,178
Well, I kinda wanted
your advice about boys.
4
00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:13,221
I'll call in sick.
5
00:00:15,557 --> 00:00:18,226
Boy advice? I'm your older sister.
That's my birthright.
6
00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:20,812
No offense, but I decided
not to ask you for advice
7
00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:23,189
when your water broke
during high school graduation.
8
00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:29,446
You're seriously asking Mom
for advice about boys?
9
00:00:29,446 --> 00:00:32,532
Barbra Jean would be better than Mom.
I would be better than Barbra Jean.
10
00:00:32,532 --> 00:00:36,161
It goes me, Barbra Jean,
Dad, Van, Jake... then Mom.
11
00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:43,084
I'm glad we don't have a dog.
12
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:49,507
Barbra Jean is nuts, and Dad, well, as he
puts it, he was a teenage boy once, too.
13
00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:51,468
And apparently, a creepy one.
14
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:56,931
I can't talk to my friends, because
everybody would know which guy I like.
15
00:00:56,931 --> 00:01:00,268
Wait a minute, are you sayin'
there was nobody left, so you came to me?
16
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,605
Fine, I'll take it. [chuckles]
17
00:01:04,814 --> 00:01:07,942
You know a bunch of kids from band have
been hanging out after practice, right?
18
00:01:07,942 --> 00:01:09,027
I do now.
19
00:01:09,652 --> 00:01:12,197
Anyways, there's this guy,
Scott, who plays trombone,
20
00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:15,325
and he's funny, and he has blue eyes,
and he's really cute.
21
00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:17,869
And does he have an older brother?
[chuckles]
22
00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:21,498
Sorry.
23
00:01:21,498 --> 00:01:24,584
Some people listen,
and some people make jokes.
24
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:29,464
Anyways, I like him,
and I think he likes me, too.
25
00:01:29,464 --> 00:01:32,050
But when I drop hints
about going to the movies or something,
26
00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,468
he just cleans his spit valve.
27
00:01:36,137 --> 00:01:38,973
- How can I tell if he likes me, too?
- I can think of, like, ten ways.
28
00:01:38,973 --> 00:01:40,266
How many can you come up with?
29
00:01:41,726 --> 00:01:45,021
I have one. You can
ask him out to the movies.
30
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:49,609
Ask him out? That is the worst advice
I've ever heard.
31
00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:53,113
A girl can't wait around forever
for a guy to clean his spit valve.
32
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,030
[scoffs]
33
00:01:54,656 --> 00:01:56,825
If you want to know
if he likes you, just ask him out!
34
00:01:57,367 --> 00:01:58,326
What if he says no?
35
00:01:59,035 --> 00:02:02,413
Well then, say, "Thank you very much"
and move on to the woodwinds.
36
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:06,376
- I guess it's better than not knowing.
- Yeah.
37
00:02:06,376 --> 00:02:07,627
- Thanks, Mom.
- Yeah.
38
00:02:08,670 --> 00:02:11,756
[chuckling] Did you hear that?
39
00:02:11,756 --> 00:02:13,800
[inhales deeply]
Kyra and I talked about dating.
40
00:02:14,425 --> 00:02:15,969
I'm gonna put that in her baby book.
41
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:19,472
- Mom, work?
- Right! I'll do that later.
42
00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:24,394
[theme song playing]
43
00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:25,687
[Reba] Hey-hey!
44
00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:28,439
{\an8}♪ My roots are planted in the past ♪
45
00:02:28,439 --> 00:02:30,733
{\an8}♪ Though my life is changing fast ♪
46
00:02:30,733 --> 00:02:34,487
♪ Who I am is who I want to be ♪
47
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:37,365
{\an8}♪ A single mom who works too hard ♪
48
00:02:37,365 --> 00:02:39,993
{\an8}♪ Who loves her kids and never stops ♪
49
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,077
♪ With gentle hands ♪
50
00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:45,123
{\an8}♪ And the heart of a fighter ♪
51
00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:49,502
{\an8}♪ I'm a survivor ♪
52
00:02:57,552 --> 00:02:59,387
{\an8}There she is. Get her, Brock.
53
00:03:02,765 --> 00:03:04,976
{\an8}Did you tell Kyra
to ask a boy out on a date?
54
00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:08,146
{\an8}I know. Can you believe Kyra
asked Mom for advice about boys?
55
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:11,274
{\an8}That's right. When it comes to
givin' Kyra advice about boys,
56
00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:15,403
{\an8}it goes, Me, Jake, Van, and then Cheyenne.
57
00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:21,159
{\an8}But what about me? Don't I make the list?
58
00:03:21,159 --> 00:03:23,077
{\an8}Oh, you're at the top of another list.
59
00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:29,375
{\an8}Well, the boy said yes, so thanks to you,
she has a date on Friday.
60
00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:33,087
{\an8}Yes! Kyra took my advice,
and it worked! That goes in the book.
61
00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,466
{\an8}- Kyra has a date because of Mom?
- Yeah.
62
00:03:36,466 --> 00:03:38,259
- [scoffs] This is crazy!
- Yeah.
63
00:03:38,259 --> 00:03:41,012
What's next? Jake's gonna give
good fashion advice?
64
00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:43,306
Well, he did pick out my shirt today.
65
00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:46,559
{\an8}I need to lie down.
66
00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:49,771
{\an8}Well, since you two are already upset,
67
00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,981
{\an8}Jake called from Vegas,
he married a showgirl.
68
00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:56,778
{\an8}- Are you finished teasin'?
- Yes-- Wait!
69
00:03:58,112 --> 00:03:59,072
Yes.
70
00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:03,785
This is a real problem, Reba.
Kyra's not allowed to date until she's 18.
71
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:07,247
Eighteen? She's not allowed
to date through high school?
72
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:11,668
It's a good rule. And it worked
wonderfully until you undermined us.
73
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,795
Hey, don't blame me.
Kyra didn't tell me about it.
74
00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:16,798
Well, she's not entirely at fault.
We haven't told her yet.
75
00:04:18,007 --> 00:04:21,636
Oh, so you guys have
a bunch of secret rules!
76
00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:24,222
Did you write 'em down in invisible ink?
77
00:04:25,682 --> 00:04:27,850
She's 14. It hadn't come up yet.
78
00:04:27,850 --> 00:04:30,895
And I was ready to ban dating altogether
after what happened to Cheyenne.
79
00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:32,480
Something happened to Cheyenne?
80
00:04:38,486 --> 00:04:39,988
- Hey!
- [B.J.] Yeah.
81
00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:42,407
I think Kyra's mature enough
to handle herself.
82
00:04:42,407 --> 00:04:44,367
It doesn't matter how mature Kyra is.
83
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:48,121
- It's the guy that's the problem.
- Oh, the guy? I'm the problem!
84
00:04:49,330 --> 00:04:51,040
Why don't you
and the rest of the villagers
85
00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,001
grab your torches and run me out of town?
86
00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,671
I'm not talking about you, Van.
87
00:04:56,671 --> 00:05:00,425
I'm talking about teenage boys
who have only one thing on their mind.
88
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:03,720
Well, I got news for you, Mr. H.
I'm a teenage boy.
89
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,221
And you know what I got on my mind?
90
00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:06,806
Nothin'!
91
00:05:12,895 --> 00:05:14,689
Well, I think you guys are overreacting.
92
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:17,025
They're two 14-year-olds goin' to a movie.
93
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:20,695
We'll meet the boy here. I'll drop 'em off
and pick 'em up. It'll be fine!
94
00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:23,364
It's not fine.
You should have checked with us
95
00:05:23,364 --> 00:05:25,533
before you told Kyra she could go out.
96
00:05:25,533 --> 00:05:27,744
I should have checked with you?
97
00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:29,579
I really believe that, as parents,
98
00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:31,539
we three should present a united front.
99
00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:33,291
- Yeah.
- That's a good idea, Barbra Jean.
100
00:05:33,291 --> 00:05:36,002
- Except you're not Kyra's parent.
- [gasps] Mean!
101
00:05:40,381 --> 00:05:42,008
Well, for the past three months,
102
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:45,178
I've been parent enough
to make her dinner and do her laundry.
103
00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,597
Wow. Three whole months!
104
00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:49,807
That is hard!
105
00:05:51,225 --> 00:05:54,312
I mean, I just gave birth to her.
You made her a sandwich!
106
00:05:56,647 --> 00:05:59,484
- Raising Kyra is my job.
- [Brock clears throat]
107
00:05:59,484 --> 00:06:00,735
Yeah, and his, too.
108
00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:04,614
So, like always,
Reba's right and we're wrong.
109
00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:06,866
Good. Remember that,
and we won't have these arguments.
110
00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:10,203
I hope you know what you're doin', Reba.
111
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:11,537
- Come on, Barbra Jean.
- Fine.
112
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:18,336
And maybe next time, I'll marry somebody
whose ex-wife appreciates me.
113
00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:19,337
[clicks tongue]
114
00:06:35,144 --> 00:06:38,064
- Hey, honey. How was practice?
- Violent.
115
00:06:39,607 --> 00:06:41,818
Those pro guys are tough and mean.
116
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:43,569
And they do not like pretty boys.
117
00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:48,241
No, it's probably because you're new.
118
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:51,244
No, no, no.
I'm the best-looking guy on the team.
119
00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:57,500
- Hey, Jake. How was school?
- That depends.
120
00:06:58,126 --> 00:07:00,211
- Is Mom home?
- No.
121
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:04,298
Then school was great!
Would you sign her name on this?
122
00:07:06,717 --> 00:07:09,262
You threw a pencil at a girl in school?
123
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:11,764
- Why do boys act like that?
- Whoa! Whoa!
124
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,309
Why do boys act like that?
Is that what you think?
125
00:07:15,309 --> 00:07:17,145
Is that what you want
our daughter to think?
126
00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:18,938
That boys are automatically the bad guy?
127
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:21,315
He's not automatically
the bad guy, Van. It's just--
128
00:07:22,775 --> 00:07:24,569
I mean, come on! They just are.
129
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,906
I bet Jake had a good reason.
Tell her, Jake.
130
00:07:28,906 --> 00:07:31,409
- I was mad.
- That's not good enough. Dig deeper.
131
00:07:32,076 --> 00:07:34,745
Jill Campbell was writing notes
about how she loves me
132
00:07:34,745 --> 00:07:36,581
and passing them to her friends.
133
00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:38,458
- She wouldn't stop.
- There ya go.
134
00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:42,962
The girl started it. And I bet she didn't
get into trouble, did she?
135
00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:44,797
Girls don't get in trouble, Van.
136
00:07:44,797 --> 00:07:47,258
Girls don't get in trouble, Cheyenne.
137
00:07:49,093 --> 00:07:51,429
It's always the guy!
Jake here is a victim.
138
00:07:52,096 --> 00:07:55,558
A victim of Jill Campbell's love
and of a sexist society.
139
00:07:56,184 --> 00:07:57,643
I got you, buddy. I got you.
140
00:07:59,937 --> 00:08:01,522
Well, I never thought of it like that.
141
00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:04,400
Me neither, but now that I have,
I'm gonna do something about it.
142
00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:08,112
[chuckles] Like what? You're gonna write
a musical about men's issues?
143
00:08:08,112 --> 00:08:11,365
- [laughing]
- [laughing sarcastically] No!
144
00:08:11,365 --> 00:08:12,325
Okay.
145
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:14,827
I'm gonna go talk to Jake's teacher.
146
00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:18,080
I make up one song in the shower,
and you won't let me live it down.
147
00:08:26,839 --> 00:08:28,049
- Hey, Mom.
- Hey!
148
00:08:28,049 --> 00:08:29,967
You mind if I get dressed
for my date here?
149
00:08:29,967 --> 00:08:31,719
Things are a little tense at the convent.
150
00:08:33,262 --> 00:08:34,430
I was hoping you would.
151
00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:36,807
I've been working on this all day,
and I've come up with
152
00:08:36,807 --> 00:08:39,977
five sure-fire interesting topics
for you guys to talk about.
153
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:43,105
- I'll just wait outside.
- No!
154
00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:46,192
Come here. Go on upstairs.
155
00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:47,902
I'll try not to embarrass you.
156
00:08:49,237 --> 00:08:50,571
- Is he here yet?
- No.
157
00:08:50,571 --> 00:08:51,906
Good, 'cause I don't like him.
158
00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:55,243
But I'm gonna like him less
when he gets here,
159
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:56,953
so I need to know how to pace myself.
160
00:08:56,953 --> 00:09:00,456
Relax. This is Kyra's first date.
We should be excited for her.
161
00:09:00,456 --> 00:09:02,875
Oh, I'm excited. Of course that's because
162
00:09:02,875 --> 00:09:06,128
I'm not Kyra's parent,
so I don't care what happens to her.
163
00:09:07,588 --> 00:09:10,091
Let the good times roll, I say!
164
00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:15,221
I don't even know
why we're meetin' this kid.
165
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:19,100
I know exactly what he's gonna say.
"Hello, sir. Nice to meet you, sir."
166
00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:22,186
Any 14-year-old punk
that calls me sir is up to no good.
167
00:09:22,186 --> 00:09:24,105
Believe me, I know what sir means.
168
00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:26,524
It's a word kids use to trick old people.
169
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:30,903
Brock, I'm sure when you meet the boy,
170
00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:33,656
you'll find that he's just a sweet,
scared little kid.
171
00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:35,908
Not all creepy like you were.
172
00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:39,453
- [doorbell rings]
- Kyra! Your date's here.
173
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:42,164
[laughs] How do I look?
174
00:09:42,164 --> 00:09:43,666
- Just--
- Oh.
175
00:09:45,209 --> 00:09:46,794
Hey. I'm Scott.
176
00:09:46,794 --> 00:09:48,838
Is it cool that I parked my car
in the driveway?
177
00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:49,839
You're Scott?
178
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,967
With a car? That you drive?
179
00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:55,303
Fourteen-year-olds don't drive.
180
00:09:55,303 --> 00:09:58,222
I know. I'm 17. [splutters]
And there's no need to worry.
181
00:09:58,222 --> 00:10:00,808
I've had my license for over a year,
and never gotten a ticket.
182
00:10:00,808 --> 00:10:02,643
Your daughter is safe with me, sir.
183
00:10:07,773 --> 00:10:08,691
Oops.
184
00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:21,287
Hey, Scott. Looks like you met my parents.
185
00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:22,872
- So, are we ready to go?
- [both] No!
186
00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:27,877
Uh, no need to rush off.
I mean, the night is young.
187
00:10:27,877 --> 00:10:29,378
Not as young as you thought.
188
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:35,593
Why don't you two have a seat?
189
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:38,512
Your father and I
will get you a snack in the kitchen.
190
00:10:38,512 --> 00:10:40,890
- Okay.
- [B.J. chuckles]
191
00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:42,975
Scott.
192
00:10:43,809 --> 00:10:44,644
Right here.
193
00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:52,777
Hi.
194
00:10:54,528 --> 00:10:55,905
I'm not Kyra's parent.
195
00:10:58,449 --> 00:10:59,408
You kids want a beer?
196
00:11:00,868 --> 00:11:02,662
- [Reba] Barbra Jean!
- I'm coming!
197
00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:07,750
Jake. Jake. Go in the living room
and embarrass your sister.
198
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,379
Five bucks if you can
chase the grown man away.
199
00:11:14,590 --> 00:11:17,802
Seventeen. He's 17 years old.
200
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:19,136
Oh, man.
201
00:11:19,136 --> 00:11:21,305
At 17, I was really bad.
202
00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:25,976
Kyra threatened me.
203
00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:28,354
That just means you're doin' your job.
Get back in there.
204
00:11:31,315 --> 00:11:34,610
What are we gonna do? I don't want
Kyra datin' a 17-year-old boy.
205
00:11:34,610 --> 00:11:37,321
But if we forbid her from dating,
she's just gonna sneak around.
206
00:11:37,321 --> 00:11:39,407
This is what happens
when we do things your way.
207
00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:41,617
I don't think this is a good time
for finger-pointing.
208
00:11:41,617 --> 00:11:43,869
Not when Tom Jones
is sitting in our living room.
209
00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:47,581
- Well, if you ask me--
- Well, I didn't!
210
00:11:47,581 --> 00:11:48,791
All right!
211
00:11:50,709 --> 00:11:52,503
You guys can stop pretending
to get snacks.
212
00:11:52,503 --> 00:11:55,047
Scott and I will grab something
once we're in Mexico.
213
00:11:55,047 --> 00:11:57,091
[scoffing] Very funny, Kyra.
214
00:11:58,259 --> 00:11:59,969
Why didn't you tell us how old he is?
215
00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,388
I'm 14, he's 17. What's the big deal?
216
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:05,433
- Dad's 45 and you're 42.
- You're 45?
217
00:12:10,813 --> 00:12:13,149
- The date is off.
- But Mom said I could go!
218
00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,401
- Yeah, well, now I'm saying you can't.
- Kyra.
219
00:12:15,401 --> 00:12:18,946
We can't allow you to go out
with a 17-year-old all by yourself.
220
00:12:19,613 --> 00:12:21,699
You and Scott can still
see each other in groups.
221
00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:25,161
Oh. Well, this is great. All my friends
are busy, and he's already here.
222
00:12:25,161 --> 00:12:26,620
Where am I gonna find a group?
223
00:12:26,620 --> 00:12:27,955
[movie soundtrack plays]
224
00:12:28,956 --> 00:12:31,041
Why do we have to see this movie?
225
00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:33,335
It's full of TV actors.
226
00:12:38,257 --> 00:12:40,926
This is the movie they wanted to see.
They're the ones on the date.
227
00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:43,053
We could have voted. There's more of us.
228
00:12:43,053 --> 00:12:44,221
[Reba and Brock] Shh!
229
00:12:44,221 --> 00:12:46,515
I can't see where they are.
How'd you lose them already?
230
00:12:46,515 --> 00:12:49,727
We didn't lose them! Besides, it's not
like we're gonna sit right beside them.
231
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:53,105
- I know. In between.
- No.
232
00:12:53,105 --> 00:12:56,400
They deserve some privacy.
Where in the heck are they?
233
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,611
[gasps] There they are
in the front row. Come on.
234
00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:00,779
We can set right here
and keep an eye on them.
235
00:13:00,779 --> 00:13:02,448
Excuse me. [clears throat]
236
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:09,997
I hate this.
237
00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:13,209
Whose bright idea was it
to have daughters?
238
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:16,378
Probably Reba's. She calls all the shots.
239
00:13:17,546 --> 00:13:20,049
[softly] Barbra Jean,
no talking in movie theaters.
240
00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:23,552
From now on, whenever you're around me,
pretend we're in a movie theater.
241
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,557
Did you see that?
He's doin' the stretch and reach.
242
00:13:28,557 --> 00:13:31,560
- He's gonna put his arm around her.
- It's just an arm.
243
00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:33,020
Just an arm?
244
00:13:33,604 --> 00:13:36,357
Do you even know how babies are born?
245
00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:40,653
Barbra Jean, would you please
just stay out of this?
246
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:44,281
Head on shoulder? We have
a head-on-shoulder situation.
247
00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:47,701
Oh, that was fast. See what happens
when you ignore the arm?
248
00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:51,247
Nothing happens.
Scott seems like a nice enough kid.
249
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:53,916
He didn't have any problem
with us tagging along.
250
00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:56,168
Besides, they both know we're here,
and I don't think--
251
00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:58,796
Oh, Lord. Did he just swallow her face?
252
00:14:01,590 --> 00:14:04,510
They're kissing. My daughter's
getting kissed right in front of me!
253
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:05,761
[patrons] Hey! Hey!
254
00:14:05,761 --> 00:14:08,556
Does anyone else smell burnt toast?
I think I'm having a stroke!
255
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,935
I don't care whose daughter she is.
Date over.
256
00:14:12,935 --> 00:14:15,521
Barbra Jean, would you
stop parenting my child?
257
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,940
If anyone says no kissin',
it's gonna be me.
258
00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:21,443
And I say, "No Kissing!"
259
00:14:23,654 --> 00:14:24,613
You're not Kyra.
260
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:26,866
[Kyra] Oh, my God.
261
00:14:47,761 --> 00:14:50,222
There's my non-sexist seeker of justice.
262
00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:54,143
- How'd it go with Jake's teacher?
- What? Oh, good!
263
00:14:54,768 --> 00:14:57,646
Good, like she agreed the girl was just
as much to blame as Jake was?
264
00:14:58,314 --> 00:14:59,690
- Yeah, pretty much.
- Oh.
265
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:02,192
She moved her desk to the other side
of the room and told her
266
00:15:02,192 --> 00:15:03,819
to stay away from Jake at recess.
267
00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:07,197
I liked her, okay? You blew it!
268
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:08,490
Well, I'm sorry!
269
00:15:11,869 --> 00:15:13,370
Honey, I'm sorry.
270
00:15:13,370 --> 00:15:15,915
But you stuck up for what you believed in,
and you were right.
271
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,250
- Yeah, kinda.
- What does that mean?
272
00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:22,713
[sighs] Maybe Jake wasn't the bad guy,
but I think I was the bad guy with you.
273
00:15:23,672 --> 00:15:25,966
I mean, your dad was right.
274
00:15:26,675 --> 00:15:28,636
I did have that thing on my mind.
275
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:31,472
I mean, you were
so innocent and unsuspecting.
276
00:15:32,306 --> 00:15:34,516
A little papaya ready to be plucked.
277
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:38,854
So I plucked.
278
00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:43,150
And now, when they talk about
279
00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:45,819
the thing that happened
to Cheyenne, I'm the thing.
280
00:15:46,820 --> 00:15:50,115
- Van, you're not "the thing."
- I am.
281
00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:52,618
And to be honest, I wasn't that innocent.
282
00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:57,289
Could you elaborate on that, please?
283
00:15:57,289 --> 00:16:00,125
I did tons of stuff to make you notice me.
284
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:02,419
Like walking past your locker
in my drill-team uniform?
285
00:16:02,419 --> 00:16:03,504
Yeah.
286
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:06,674
Pretending I needed a ride home
'cause my mom forgot to pick me up?
287
00:16:06,674 --> 00:16:08,008
I mean, come on, Van.
288
00:16:08,008 --> 00:16:11,053
What kind of mom forgets to pick
her daughter up every day for a month?
289
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:15,891
- I just assumed she drank.
- [chuckles]
290
00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:22,481
- So, girls really do that kind of stuff?
- Mm-hmm.
291
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:24,400
Is that why Tammy Torenzi
did the same thing?
292
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,735
No. She's just a slut.
293
00:16:34,451 --> 00:16:37,371
Thanks for not running away in fear
after meeting my psycho parents.
294
00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:40,290
It's... it's fine. Don't worry about it.
And wait till you meet mine.
295
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:42,793
- My Dad makes his own pickles.
- [chuckles]
296
00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:52,678
Five minutes means five minutes.
297
00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:56,140
You got...
298
00:16:57,975 --> 00:16:59,143
four more minutes.
299
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:06,775
So, um, see you at school?
300
00:17:06,775 --> 00:17:08,027
Yeah.
301
00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:14,199
Yeah.
302
00:17:16,493 --> 00:17:17,327
Bye.
303
00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:27,296
I don't get it. If you didn't
want me to go on a date,
304
00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:28,464
why didn't you just say so?
305
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:29,798
I did want you to go.
306
00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:32,968
I just didn't want that other couple
to have any fun.
307
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:37,681
Well, I was against it.
308
00:17:37,681 --> 00:17:40,059
But once again, we did it your mom's way.
309
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:41,477
Well, my way didn't include
310
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:44,063
Barbra Jean puttin'
her two cents in all night long.
311
00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:47,858
Well, if you had listened to my two cents,
Kyra wouldn't have gone on a date.
312
00:17:47,858 --> 00:17:49,735
Kyra going on a date wasn't the problem.
313
00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,862
- You're the problem!
- You know what? I--
314
00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:54,782
Will you stop? This is the problem.
315
00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,825
The three of you fighting
over everything I do.
316
00:17:58,535 --> 00:18:01,622
I can live with rules, but you three
have to agree on what they are.
317
00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:03,248
Otherwise, I'm the one who suffers.
318
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:06,293
You ruined my first date.
319
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:07,795
Ruined?
320
00:18:08,504 --> 00:18:09,922
Or made memorable?
321
00:18:12,508 --> 00:18:15,594
I'm sorry. You're right.
It wasn't fair to you.
322
00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:18,931
From now on, your father and I
will discuss all the rules
323
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:20,349
so there'll be no confusion.
324
00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:21,934
And Barbra Jean.
325
00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:24,686
You don't want this to work, do you?
326
00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:27,898
- You're doing it again.
- Okay, fine.
327
00:18:28,982 --> 00:18:32,194
Barbra Jean can participate.
But you two only get one vote.
328
00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:35,989
- Why do we only get one?
- One brain, one vote. That's the law.
329
00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:40,994
Okay. So, I guess the three of us
330
00:18:40,994 --> 00:18:43,872
are gonna have to figure out
some system for making rules.
331
00:18:43,872 --> 00:18:45,958
Well, I think, since she lives with us,
332
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:48,961
Brock and I should make the rules
and then run them by you.
333
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:52,381
Or, I can put the rules in a car
and run them over you.
334
00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:53,298
[Brock groans]
335
00:18:55,884 --> 00:18:58,387
I think the best system would be
if I didn't have any rules
336
00:18:58,387 --> 00:19:00,055
and I could prove how responsible I am.
337
00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:01,515
All in favor?
338
00:19:06,186 --> 00:19:07,688
Sorry. I was pulling for you.
339
00:19:10,190 --> 00:19:12,818
Okay. I have a few rules
that I would like to discuss.
340
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:15,279
Barbra Jean, you can vote
on the rules, you can't make them.
341
00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:17,239
- That's not fair!
- I don't care what's fair!
342
00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:19,449
You were right. I should have come to you.
343
00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:21,660
- [grown-ups arguing]
- Me. Mom.
344
00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:26,415
- [B.J.] This is our house--
- Nobody's listening--
345
00:19:31,086 --> 00:19:33,714
Jake! Good news, buddy.
346
00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:35,716
I fixed everything with Jill Campbell.
347
00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:37,801
I told her the reason
you threw a pencil at her
348
00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:39,803
was because you liked her. Guess what?
349
00:19:39,803 --> 00:19:42,222
She's waitin' for you
outside on the porch. [chuckles]
350
00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:45,767
- Come on.
- You talked to Jill Campbell?
351
00:19:45,767 --> 00:19:48,103
Now, don't expect this every time, okay?
352
00:19:48,103 --> 00:19:50,272
The next babe you get on your own, right?
353
00:19:51,356 --> 00:19:53,358
I don't like Jill Campbell anymore.
354
00:19:53,358 --> 00:19:55,569
I already threw something
at Linda Osborne.
355
00:19:57,154 --> 00:19:59,656
- [knocking at door]
- Jake! You have a date!
356
00:19:59,656 --> 00:20:02,409
No, Van. You have a date.
357
00:20:04,953 --> 00:20:06,580
[knocking at door]
358
00:20:08,081 --> 00:20:10,292
I was wrong.
Jake doesn't live here anymore.
359
00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:24,139
[closing theme music playing]